My family and I love to watch old home videos from when my brother and I were younger. It's always interesting to see how you looked and how you acted when you were 2 years old, 6 years old, 10 years old, etc. Reflecting on the way I've progressed as a person over my 21 years of life is really interesting. When I was 2 years old, I was the entertainment in the family. At family gatherings I would dance, sing, I would give "the Tonia look" when told to. I was a total goofball, and I loved it. Totally extraverted. So completely opposite from who I am now. At the age of 21, I consider myself to be a very introverted, passive individual. I'm quiet, shy around people I don't know, as well as in large groups. How did I go from one end of the spectrum all the way to the other end in just 19 years? I have had many different experiences throughout my life, but out of them all, those that have involved heartache are the ones that have changed me the most.
I was watching a home video with my parents last night from my great grandmother's 75th birthday in 1996. The date of the surprise party was January 20th. Little did the 6-year-old Megan in the video know that on that exact date, 12 years later, she would begin the most difficult 2 & 1/2 years of her life. On January 20, 2008, I had my heart totally shattered in the time frame of about 5 seconds. This day marked the beginning of a very rocky road, filled with too much emotion and confusion to put into words. But, little did I know that this very long, twisted road would end up being a blessing in disguise.
I made more mistakes than I can count during this time, but those mistakes ended up being crucial for my growth later. At the beginning of this, I was still at Elon and I was a complete wreck. Everything people think of when they consider the "typical" college student, was pretty much me in a nutshell. My priorities were not in line, and I had slipped a very scary distance away from God. I had no friends at school who knew God intimately, and it ended up being a very bad atmosphere for me to live in. I also lost a very special family member during this time - he was the first person whose death really affected me. Losing my Pa, on top of the stress than came along with school work and other issues I encountered at Elon, eventually ended up pushing me to my breaking point. I came home over spring break 2010, and never went back to Elon still to this day. I applied to transfer to UNCW for this past fall, got accepted, and have been here ever since.
Since I've been home, the transformation in my life has been incomprehensible to me. I went to Kenya a second time in August 2010 (which you can read about in previous blog posts), and it was totally life-changing. I thought my first mission there was incredible, but it didn't even compare to this one. Since I have been back from Kenya in the past few months, I have made a lot of positive changes in my life. I now surround myself with people who are only going to raise me up, encourage me, and love me for who I am. People who are Christ-like and make me want to be a better person. I am now very involved in volunteer work within my church on a weekly basis, I started attending the college ministry at PC3, and I also joined a small group consisting of fellow college-age girls who love the Lord as much as I do! I have been made new. I am a completely different person than I was 2 & 1/2 years ago, and for that, I am truly thankful. It also wouldn't have happened if it wasn't for my fellow August 2010 Kenya teammates. My life has been blessed by every single individual I traveled there with, as well as by all the children at Mama Hellen's and the people in the Kenyan community. Had it not been for that long, tangled, and twisted road I ventured down, I would not be the person I am today.
So, the next time you hit a bump in the road, or the next time you think something in your life is too hard for you to handle, REMEMBER 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 - "But He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
No comments:
Post a Comment